Benjamin Disraeli wrote: “Man is not the creature of circumstance. Circumstance is the creature of man. We are all free agents, and man is more powerful than matter.” Time to explore what that means in the real world.
There’s no shortage of #bestdayever hashtags on social media these days, but they often reference superficial circumstances or material possessions. There’s nothing wrong with that, but there’s got to be more there, right? I began exploring what might actually be the best day of your life.
After digging through the millions of articles, videos, audios, and opinions on the internet, the question of what constitutes the truest definition of “the best day of your life” starts to clear up a little. It turns out, it has nothing to do with material possessions or relationships.
Sorry lovers, it appears “the day I met you was the best day of my life” was a lie.
Some people told stories of being unable to achieve their best day ever due to some circumstance beyond their control. During my research, I was made keenly aware of the trials and tribulations of what it is to be the victim. There is a sense of entitlement in the world, and it’s not doing anyone any good. “Oh poor me” isn’t getting you anywhere, and frankly, it’s bullshit. I hear people talk about how they can’t get what they want because they don’t have A or B or C.
They don’t have what it takes because someone took away their X or Y or Z a long time ago. Or worse, they can’t make the changes they want because the economy is bad. You mean to tell me you can’t change your attitude, create goals and actions plans, or get your ass in gear toward the life you want because the economy is bad?
I asked a friend of mine to describe what the best day of his life looked like. He told me the best day was the one in which he wouldn’t have to work a job he didn’t like. He described a day filled with people being nice to him, and everything he wanted being delivered to him on a silver platter. It sounds nice, right? The detail often missed in stories like these is in the narrative. Is the subject describing a day in which he goes and gets what he wants, makes executive decisions, takes control, or do great things happen to him?
When I mentioned that the best day wasn’t about relationships, that was a half truth. It’s not about the relationship you establish with another human, it’s the identity to acquire from that relationship. Here’s an example to illustrate what I mean:
When a baby is born, men and women will often say “the day I met my child was the best day of my life.” It’s not actually about the child; rather, it’s about becoming a parent. The new identity is overwhelming and a sense of duty, pride, responsibility, ownership, and love suddenly courses through your veins. You are different now. You are stepping up.
This applies to becoming a husband. It applies to becoming anything really. It’s not about achievement – it’s about identity. Recognizing it and owning it.
Here’s the hard truth:
The best day of your life is when you wake up to it and claim it as your own. It’s the day when you take responsibility and choose to stop apologizing, blaming, or being the victim any longer. It’s not good things happening to you – it’s you deciding it’s your life, and God-damn-it you’re going to make good things happen.
Everyone, every moment of every day, is at choice. They (yeah, you included) can either decide to be a leaf in the wind, or the wind itself. Benjamin Disraeli wrote: “Man is not the creature of circumstance. Circumstance is the creature of man. We are all free agents, and man is more powerful than matter.”
You have a decision to make. Stop the bullshit story and start the story of your life…or don’t.
The greatest day of your life? That’s easy. It’s the day you decide to start living.
Got something to add? Put it in the comments below!